If you didn't imagine a huge shockwave emitting from me when I said "now" at the end of this post, you can reread it if you want
In case you need some ideas for your Halloween costume, here is what the senior citizens at "The Basin Creek Retirement Village" came up with
Found on: TikTok
I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(
hnn I WANT IT SO BAD
on closer inspection, it makes a lot of really obnoxious noises and is also Too Expensive. BUT FEAR NOT I found this slightly smaller dude wedged in the back!
IT HAS BITE ACTION, AND THAT’S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS
now we enter the testing phase
yup. looks good.
Extreme Chompin T-Rex says IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS
Can we take a moment to appreciate that we can use this as a rosetta stone to say “EXTREME CHOMPIN’ “ in four languages?
OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT, let me check the garbage to see if it’s still there! hopefully I didn’t destroy it in my excitement
*roar sound effect*
IMPORTANT UPDATE:
update update: I re-sized her collar and found a bag of toy bones at the craft store. I haven’t put this much effort into a non-school thing since my last job search, help
(secret bonus: the other side of her tag)
There’s more!
I love.
I saw that people are reblogging the thread again, so I thought I’d give you all an update on how Wexter is doing!
(just fine)
Wexter And The Case Of Her Continuing Marvelously Naughty Garden Adventures
Wexter says SHE WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING (but she might chew your ankles a little bit maybe)
so it’s come to my attention that at some point this weekend Wexter blew past 100,000 notes, and I for one think that’s very cash money of her.
it’s been a few weeks, I suppose we should check up on the AHSGSHGAFB?!
ajdhf.
well that’s just,,,
REXCELLENT
two hundred THOUSAND notes???!?!
HELL
YES
HELL
FUCKING
YES.
OP and Wexter can break all my toes and I would still send a thank you card
cry, probably
Reblogging to get you one note closer to crossing the 400k mark!
IT’S TIME
YOU MANIACS. okay, here we go!
HAIL TO THE QUEEN
LONG MAY SHE REIGN!
(she was a skater Rex, she said see you later Rex, she’s finally hit 400k!)
we’re coming to you live from Halloween 2022, where Wexter continues to be ridiculously jawsome!
this year we’re doing a much-beloved character from classic literature, “Dracula with inappropriate straw hat”
thanks everyone, may your weens be hollow and your candy be many!
hey! HEY. it’s Halloween 2023! AND YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT WEXTER IS DRESSED UP AS THIS YEAR.
she’s… (WEXTER! here girl!) she’s a… a…..
she’s a T. Rex.
GOTTEM!
Halloween 2024.
ERASERHEAD BABY.
ohshit
hello from Halloween 2025! it’s been a hell of a year, but it’s okay.
everything will be fine.
*somebody told me by the killers voice*
somebody told me
that you were a mummy
that looked like a vampire
that i had at frankensteins castle
its not confidential
goblin has potential
scared by a scared by a clown
apparently this is a thing in Japan too, and it gets translated as “Mundane Halloween.” There are so photos online and they’re all so good?????
“Person going to work on a windy day"
“Woman who’s having her bang cut but the hairdresser is nowhere to be found"
"Zookeeper in charge of the pandas"
Here are two more:
"Not pregnant lady when someone yield seat to her on subway"
And my favorite
"Person on thermal infrared camera"
Might share more tomorrow.
Influencers taking selfies at a gym
Starbucks barista working her ass off on Halloween but gotta keep up that smile
Person who sits on wet paint
Person who's still loading
Boyfriend carrying girlfriend's shopping bags
I love these so much
This is such a cute picture
Black cats, jack-o-lanterns, fall leaves, the best things for Halloween
If I had capital-s Superpowers I wouldn't use them to punch alien gods, I'd use them to become a science youtuber.
"Hi guys, welcome back to the channel, I've got a real treat for you today! You might notice the lab looks different, I didn't want to risk putting anyone else in danger with today's experiment and if you've been reading the news this week you'll know that a bunch of big important people on Earth are pretty mad at me right now, so I'm shooting this episode on the moon!
"This is uranium-238, an extremely rarified form of the uranium used in some nuclear reactors. If I get the camera closer, you see that 'snow' appearing in the image? That's caused by individual radioactive ions escaping from the uranium. It's warm to the touch and very pliable. See how easily it's bending? Compare that to how much force I had to use to flatten out that tungsten cube last week, remember how that took both hands?
"Anyway, I know what you're going to ask,"
*voice clip of Snake from metal gear solid saying 'But how does it taste?'*
"Well, we're going to find out! I'm just going to tear off a tiny bit here... Hmm. The taste and texture is similar to lead, but warm and a little fizzy. That would be from those escaping ions hitting the skin cells of my tongue and bouncing off. I'd better spit this out quickly, if one of those bounces back into the uranium it could-
*a loud but muffled explosion sound is heard*
"Okay, so that was what's called a fission reaction! A little nuclear explosion went off in my mouth! That was certainly a new experience, I don't think I want to do that again. It wasn't nearly as much fun as the lava I ate back in the Hawaii video.
"Well, I'm going end this one here and get all these things ready for the next part of their journey. Stay tuned for part 2, where we see what happens when I throw the world's entire nuclear arsenal into the sun! As always, stay safe, stay curious, and have a Super day!"
Crimetober 1-9
Because birds are criminals.
Crimetober 10-21
When will they be held accountable
The pun on “piracy” tho
an oral thermometer takes the temperature of your mouth. a rectal thermometer takes the temperature of your rectum. [confidently] a digital thermometer takes the temperature of your finger.
everyone say in the tags what their current custom discord status is
I need everyone who is mean to start being kind and nice NOW